Saturday, May 10, 2014
The will is strong in this one...wait these two.
I'm not a nice mom. I don't use soft words, I use the mom look and sometimes - I'm going to say it - I yell. Raising kids makes you see yourself - like really see yourself. They emulate you and while I know a lot of my daughters strength of will and downright bossiness is what she see's in me, it's not all bad. I'm sure if I look really closely I'll see her being like me in the good ways. I'm trying to yell less. I really am and I've been doing ok but I'm not perfect and I make mistakes.
It's funny because for all her strength of will my son is the independent one. He wants to do everything himself while my daughter, who is older, still lets me pick out her clothes. Her strong will shows in things like sharing, or her single mindedness in finding a toy she hasn't played with in forever, so I have no idea where it might be. Her imagination too - she's always a teacher, or a queen, or a ruler of some kind.
My son, as I mentioned, has to do everything himself and just plain doesn't like listening. If he's not supposed to do it - he will - and I know kids are like that. He actually asks to be put in time out's....we're still trying those - he's only 2 so he'll get it at some point right. Reasoning with a two year old is likened to what I can imagine a scientist trying to explain strong theory to me. Blank looks all around. BUT he puts his shoes on himself, his jacket, he always wants to help or for me to teach him something. Such amazing characteristics in a little person.
A friend once told me that the important part of parenting "spirited" children is to teach them, protect them and nurture them without breaking them. I'm so grateful to her for that advice because her voice literally pops up in my head every day. As an aside, you can check out other pearls of wisdom from April at thismomsgotsomethingtosay.com.
So there lies the balance. Parenting without breaking them, loving them while still teaching them that certain things are wrong, or hurtful or could hurt them. Trying to balance is like trying to find the fountain of youth me thinks. We can only do the best we can - keep on truckin mama's.